Dear Son...I'm Praying for Your Future

Dear Son,

I know that right now you are more interested in playing with friends and food than anything else. But before I blink you’ll be driving, dating, and be in college. I've been praying for you and your future wife since you were a week old, and I want you to know that I will love the girl you bring home as wife. It is my prayer that she’s being raised by parents who love God above all else and that they are teaching her the value of purity just like Daddy and I are trying to teach you. You've already made the most important decision of your life by choosing to put on our Lord in baptism. I’m so pleased with what I see in your heart…your love for God and others makes me strive to live the way I’m supposed to. Your tender heart is beautiful and your ability to put smiles on my face and that of others is a wonderful gift. I love you but before you get much older, I thought it might interest you to know what’s in my heart.

The choices you make now will affect your entire life. Your choices of friends and the girls you give a piece of your heart to even now can determine whether or not you reach your goal of heaven. Please be careful with that tender heart, it will be broken at some point for that is the nature of this world. Prov 22:24-25 Make no friendship with an angry man, And with a furious man do not go, Lest you learn his ways And set a snare for your soul. We laugh together when I warn you that girls are nothing but trouble. We both know how much fun you can have when you’re getting into trouble, so be careful. 2 Cor 6:13-14 Now in return for the same I speak as to children, you also be open. Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? Remember you marry who you date, and you date those you choose to spend time with. God wants wonderful things for you and his plans for you are beautiful, so do your part and think before you act.
Pro 19:20-23 Listen to counsel and receive instruction, That you may be wise in your latter days.
There are many plans in a man's heart, Nevertheless the LORD's counsel--that will stand.
What is desired in a man is kindness, And a poor man is better than a liar.
The fear of the LORD [leads] to life, And [he who has it] will abide in satisfaction; He will not be visited with evil

I can only imagine that when you read this, the thought will cross your mind, “Yeah, like you have room to talk, Mama!” But it’s because I fell in love with Daddy when I was 14 that I do have room to talk for change. Go places where you will meet girls who will value your relationship with God. Look at their hearts and not only their pretty faces. Can you see the love of Christ shining in her? Does she care for others? How does she talk to her friends? Does she talk about the power of prayer and is she willing to stand up and share her love for the gospel with others? I see you already doing these things and I’m so proud of you! I’m praying you will find someone who will encourage you to do the work of the Father, that she will help you walk the straight and narrow.

I’m not naïve enough to think that temptation won’t ever come your way, because Daddy and I know just how hard it is to remain pure. I’m praying you date girls who you can enjoy being with but not have to fight lust and Satan the whole time you’re out.

Please before you give your heart away, visit with the young lady’s parents. Listen to how she talks to her parents, how they talk to her, and how they talk to each other. Your Daddy has been working to raise you to be a gentleman who stands up for what is right and good, and who places women in a place of honor. I can remember when Daddy would hold and rock you and tell you that he was going to raise you to be a loving, spiritual leader in your home if it killed the two of you. Be kind and gentle, yet firm. Lead without stepping on the girls you date, speak up when it’s right, and remain silent when you should. Walk the girl to the door, don’t sit out in the car or spend too long saying goodnight (trust me it’ll make your Christian walk easier…Daddy and I learned that lesson the hard way). If you’ll bring her home to visit, I promise not to tell the embarrassing stories or bring out the photo albums. I pray that I treat every girl you date with love and respect, and that even after you break up with her or she with you that I’ll not say anything bad about her…you just never know, you might fall for her again. (Read Eph. 5:22-6:5)

I pray that you choose a girl who encourages you to call me and Daddy. I pray that she will ask you to spend time with us and her together. Ask her the hard questions early. Remember that she will help determine if you enjoy time spent with family and friends. Know that you can’t change her anymore than she can change you. Make a list of pros and cons before you ask her to marry you. When you look at that list, pay close attention to the cons. Will you be able to spend a lifetime happily with her in spite of those things? Remember that once your married, you’ll both relax and say and do things that will hurt the other, and the cons list will be the arsenal she’ll pull from when you fight. (By the way, at some point I’ll encourage her to make a similar list and make the same choices.)

Remember when you marry her…you marry her family. Can you live with them and they with you? Does she ask you to pray for her? Do you study God’s word together? Do you talk about what heaven will be like and dream about it together? Above all, do you want to spend eternity with her and she with you? Is God the most important being in both your lives? Are you working together to serve the Father?

I know all of this doesn’t make sense today, but it will before I can blink. I’m praying for you and me. I’m praying you will be the husband God wants you to be and that I’ll be the mother-in-law He wants me to be. I’m praying you will find someone who you can open the secret parts of your heart with and she with you. Finally, I’m praying that the commitment you make is not done because you feel like you have to, but because you can’t imagine your life spent with anyone else. Remember two wrongs never make a right and that love is a decision you make not a feeling that comes and goes. I’m praying divorce is a word that you as a couple will remove from your vocabulary, and that you have awesome sex life in your marriage, the way God intends. Remember she can’t read your mind any more that you can read her‘s, so you must talk to each other. I pray that you remember that she needs to hear you say, “I love you”, “You’re the most beautiful girl in the world!”, and she needs your hugs. I pray that she knows her respect for you is the biggest “I love you and hug” she can give you, that she only says good things about you, and that she’ll know that love does not keep a record of wrongs.

OK, so I’ll close. I know that you’re used to me talking too much, but I just wanted you to know I love you and I want only God’s best plan for you…and that you will keep your heart open to His desire for your life.

Love you,
Mama